Monday, January 2, 2023

A New Year

 Happy New Year, friends! 

I wanted to write yesterday but felt out of spirits to do so so I thought I'd write today - 2 days into a brand new 2023.

I didn't celebrate the new year - I stayed home and got ready for bed. I managed to see some fireworks from the balcony of my apartment and that was it. Long gone are the days of going to Curve to celebrate (remember that place?). I remember my mum picking us up from a night's worth of celebrating and the traffic was so bad that she was in it for about 2 hours. Crazy.

Ok anyway, thought I'd share here on my resolutions and just overall thoughts on what I hope to accomplish this new year and my turning 30 (!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!). 


+ I hope to find more meaningful work in my career. I do love my job and i've grown a lot from when I first started and have met so many influential people. Above all, I love my friends from work so much and when I wasn't in the head space to meet friends/family, I still had to go to work so them being there and covering for me and essentially taking care of me has been monumental in my healing. I love them so much and owe them a great deal in helping me everyday - in both my career growth and my mental health. But back to the point, I do hope to find myself a change in this and see what else and where else I can potentially be good in. 


+ I'm keeping my friend circle bit tight this year. For most of my social life (so that's from age 12 and above haha), I loved making friends and I loved being in every circle I possibly could. My friends used to joke about me being the social butterfly in the group and would ask me for updates about everyone else. Mun even once said, "Nadia, you're like Dora the Explorer, you say hi to everyone around you!" when we were walking together to class in college. I was painfully shy when I was younger so it almost feels like I was making up for the years I had no friends. But what I've also realised was that I was spreading myself too thin, perhaps being friends with the wrong people and/or pouring energy into friendships that weren't reciprocative. I guess I just realised that I couldn't and shouldn't always be the one to initiate and maintain friendships; that isn't a responsibility I'm going to take. Anymore, at least.


+ Spend less time on social media. After taking some time off my main Instagram account, it has been so much better for my mental health. Like I've mentioned in my previous post, being on Instagram has, for a long time now, affected my confidence and self-esteem. So it was just for the best that I took a break from it. Plus, it's quite nice to *not* know about someone all the time.


+ Save more money. I have to learn and be mindful of my spending habits and be sure to put savings as a priority. But also, equally, to not stress out too much about it or not let it stop me from buying/doing the things I genuinely love. InsyaAllah money will always be there for as long as I do good, honest work. Life experiences don't always come!


+ Take more travel initiatives. I managed to squeeze in a short trip to Jakarta in the past month and even though that was for just a weekend, it was still so great to be out of the country and experience a different culture altogether. It was a breather that was much needed. I really loved it and I look forward to more trips this year. Places I specifically want to go to (again): Seoul, London, Amsterdam, and South of France. 


+ Be more charitable. InsyaAllah out of all my goals above, this one I really, really, really want to fulfil. To just be more charitable as much as I can and to do good wherever whenever I can. I always believe that the more good you are to the world around you, insyaAllah the more good will come your way. I have a little thing I thought of this year and I hope I get to follow through the whole year and insyaAllah for as long as I can possibly do it for. 

+ Volunteer. I'd love to see what I can do in terms of volunteering. I have a special place in my heart for school kids so maybe around that region. If you know of any good start off points, let me know! 


But most and foremost, I just want to be happy. At the end of the day, everything above is to make and keep me happy. And whatever that will get me there, I will do it. If it means cutting some people loose, if it means saying fuck it i'll go for that expensive manicure, if it means crying sampai penat, if it means spending some alone time, if it means traveling far and wide, if it means staying home, if it means saying no to somethings and yes to a lot more, then I'll do my best to get there. We owe it to ourselves to live this life best we can. 

I hope you have a great, meaningful, exciting new year ahead of you. 

Thanks for sticking around, friends.