It's Not You, It's Me

I feel so empty inside.

No feelings. It's scary how I'm alone most of the days. I have friends, a lot of them but I feel so alone. 

I have no interest in people, things, studies (!), events, everything and anything. It's creeping up my nerves now that I don't have ANYTHING to be psyched about. Which is sad because I'm 16 but inside I feel freakin' 60. 

Seriously crappy feeling, this.

I have to have something to feel great about.

Currently, my speech capability is not at a great state. 

I think if outings were arranged, I'd be too ass lazy to go. 

WHAT IS MY PROBLEM SIAL BABI #$%^&*(

Procrastinate? Me?

Apologies for the lack of updates. 

As much as I would like to say the reason behind said hiatus was because 'Catching up on studies', I can't. Cause I didn't.

And that makes me feel so worthless. Oh well, moving on.

Product of laziness have stunningly showed in black and white. I can't answer a damned mathematic questions (needless to say, it's the worst of the 2- additional) without having to refer to every reference book in the house for an answer. And I still don't get it. Who is to be blamed ? It's not polite to point so shh. 

Having difficulty answering maths is bad enough, I'm way behind my homework and it's piling by the day. Mid year is in a couple of weeks (please, no counting in days, people) and I intend to study. Every day, different subject. Sounds bearable.. right? I need to atleast pass my add maths. Numbers don't make sense anymore, goddamnit !

Talk With Your Hips

HI SURAYA :')

Famed twin towers are always bombarded with people. You don't breathe air when you go there. You breathe people. Unpleasant experience, I tell you, what with their bad BO. ANYHOO

Topshop being the first shop we stepped into (no surprise seeing from where we park, the escalators went up and practically brought us to Topshop. Convenient much?) and for the first time in a long one, mum actually went in with us which was awkward because I'm so used to roam around in shops alone (Shut your lips, I'm no loner, I just prefer doing things alone without the company and the need to be responsive with other people) and with that comes the advantage of letting my wallet take in serenity and let my mum pay for the bag (a black leather one with a chain handle and tassle) that I snagged. Score.

Zara was next and I must say, this time around, impressive. Not that Zara was never impressive, but this time there are SEVERAL (OHMY!) garments I don't mind spending a bomb on. So yes, that's impressive to me. I could have pressed my face against the display windows because the cotton shorts was in the prettiest pink and despite me being 16 (konon pre-adult. Pfsh, who are we kidding?) I still have a soft spot for anything pink. And glitter. And butterflies. And stars. You get the picture.  

Devoured in some Italian food and went back short after. I didn't get the chance to go up to Kinokuniya because a part of me was too lazy to endure the number of people on the escalator (and like I said, their BO kills) so I skipped on that.. and regretted. 

So, people, that was my Sunday, unsure as to how that is interesting to anyone but yeah, hell, it made up for my not-even-inching-off-the-bed Saturday. 

Holler

Pretty Young Thing

Benar.

HA THIS IS WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT

Watch and weep, siaaaaal

It's been a tiring week. A week with nothing to be tired about. My sleeping cycle is just as messed up as Amy Winehouse. Waking up at 6 courtesy of repetitious banging off the door (MOTHER!) is not exactly the best way to wake up. 

I find myself hitting Play on Britney Spears' old good songs a million times a day. I was not kidding when I say I'm ancient when it comes to songs. I only know the songs Fly FM so annoyingly puts on every other hour. 

ANYWAY

I'm tired as hell and tomorrow will be a tiring day.

THINKING of it makes me tired.

Ta

Lollipop, Must Mistake Me As A Sucker

Look ! Lollipops !

Uber cool, I want one but Cola flavoured (Y)

How's your day ? Mine was okay.

And damn it, it shouldn't be just okay, it should be something I'd be over the moon about.

I know I hate Miley with all my guts because of the too much popularity the world shoves in her but her new song The Climb sedap pulak. 

Izzati, so just so you know, after seeing you (and your pretty eyeliner!) at Ila's 16th, I can't wait to get my forever-wanting-new-things hands on them. Sampai boleh pergi check it up at bobbibrowncosmetics.com lagi tu.

Topshop's getting boring. *cue exasperated yawns

Zara too and don't even let Forever 21 escape your mouth. All of them are getting overrated.

I want something new. Something I know easily that the next girl won't possess. 

I always debate with myself whenever I ask for a trip to Telawi Street because I end up empty handed (AFTER GOING UP AND DOWN THE KAJILLION STAIRS) and using my money for a drink at Starbucks. Which I don't even favour.

Hell, I'm already broke as it is so fantasizing in anything to do with purchasing anything isn't on my to do list just yet. Understanding additional mathematics, however, is. It frustrates me when I don't get the jumbling of numbers on the board but what frustrates me even more is that I don't even try to understand. Apa kejadah?

Don't get me started with Physics. 

Ok, tomorrow is a new day.

Should be a better one, right?

Right.

Nabila Muzamir,

IT IS ILA'S BIRTHDAY TODAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!

Woot woot, 16 cheers for the girl who is the world's own Rebecca Bloomwood ! (Minus the horrifying debts)(Ke betul?)

I didn't get to see her much on her birthday :( sebab tengah terer kawad.

ANYWAY

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR DARLING ! 

You've been the best friend ever, serious shiznit.

You're the only one in class I can talk about Gucci shoes yang melampaui had allowance kitorang. (Takpe takpe, tengok la nanti, we'll grow rich and fabulous ! HAHAHAHA)

Thank you for the immense patient you blissfully possess (in hopes some of it will rub on me because compared to you, my patience is zilch. Nada.) 

Thank you for LISTENING TO ME ! (Most important because you're too nice and polite to listen to all my problems and heartaches)

You also have this laugh yang memang comel gila, because when you laugh, I can't help but laugh too hahaha.

Besides being ultra smart, you're one of the most humble person I have ever come across. 

It's also a good thing la kan, we have the same taste in designers ! Yeay us !

Hahahaha MARC JACOBS 4 LIFE. 

Thank you a kabillion billion for everything you've done and said (serious shit, you haven't said anything that has hurt me tau, woot woot Gooooo Ilaa !)

Sumpah sayang gila babi kat you :')

Your present is still KIV (Keep In View HEHE) because shopping a present for you is next to impossible sebab tak tahu nak beli apa langsung langung !

Dina pun sama.

I love you !

XOXO

(Ya Allah, I seriously tak tahu Karen pun letak 'real life Rebecca Bloomwood' tu tau! Jangan ingat I tiru, :'( I came up with that on my own! hahahaha. Seriously)

Laugh Til You Shout

Sumpaaah I had the best fun at Ila's 16th !

Gelak baik punya kat that table yang macam Italiannies/Paris dengan Amy, Sarah, Dina, Fatin and sometimes Ila hahahahahahahaha

Sakit perut/pipi gelak (':

I haven't had that much fun in the longest time !

Proper post tomorrow .. I think.

Dina Suraya

HAPPY BIIIIRTHDAAAAAAY TOOOOO YOUUUU

HAAAAAPPY BIIIIRTHDAAAAY TOO YOUUU

HAAPPPYYYYY BIRTHDAAAAAY TO DIIIINAAAA

HAAAAAPPYYY BIIIRRRRTHDAAAAY TOOO YOUUUUU

Woot Woot, dah 16 !

Sep sikit la, JOIN THE CLUB BABEH!

(Sumpah gambar kat atas, I macam muka constipated HAHA tapi takpe)

Dina was so cute in Bio just now when she could answer a question related to Disaccharides (WOW INGAT SIAL!) and when she was correct she would say, 'Yeay, I'm 16!'

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Dina, kau 16 ke 13 ke, semua questions you jawab betul -.-

HAHAHAHA lawak la Dina

:')

I love Dina because

1) She's funny as hell

2) She laughs, you laugh (sumpah betul! Macam contagious punya laugh)

3) She's one of the nicest girl I've ever met and memang, I always say this to every other girl tapi Dina ni, her 'nice' satu jenis punya 'nice'. She really thinks of other people and she's not self centered. Dia cam mana eh, she's like very polite and she has all the patience in the world bila bab mengajar add maths (like she said, 'you should know i'm a teeny bit smarter in that particular subject now'). 

4) Ok, in 3 dah ada 3 points -___-

5) She understands me :') 

6) Dia jenis semua kawan dia jadi bestfriend because she really IS there for you when you're down.

7) Senang cerita, I love you ! 

HAHAHA

Dahla lawa hari ni pakai tudung lain jenis (cause her house had the misfortune of experiencing black out pagi pagi buta so she couldn't find her tudung which was funny but because she's 16 kan, HAHAHAHAHA. Dina jadi 16 je black out rumah)

Happy 16th and cheers to more birthdays and may our friendship last !

London sama sama kan? 

HAHA

xoxo

You Took Your Own Blame

I now find that I have pretty good bed hair. Atleast I'll have that! Waking up to messy but decent hair, sounds good to me. 

Skipped school today (and tomorrow HEHE) but will try to make it for choral speaking practice. Yes, once again. As embarrassing as it was losing (I'm talking last place, people) last year, I was sure to have doubts in entering choral speaking again. I have a whole lot on my hands, tuition and its load of homework and I've been very dismissive when it comes to school homework. Bah.

I'm lazy right now and I can't see well because of the rude awakening by Mum asking if I wanted to go school (at 11, I'm cool like that) and I lazily replied no only to regret not waking up earlier as I really did want to show up for practice. Damn you, snooze button. So hence, I shall do things in a point form.

1. Dreams of a holiday at the end of the year (one that have caused me a lot of day dreaming) have come to a halt. Ok, maybe not that. I am crossing my fingers so hard, I'll swear it'll break into half, that my dad keeps his promise (what promise? Compromise sounds better). It depends on him but by the looks of the way he spends things right now (house renovation.. not good) pretty much blocks the way. I don't see why he needs to doctor the house, the initial plan was to just paint the house, not redo it! And the whole kabaam going on downstairs is just, as he would like to put it, 'Phase 1'. They're 2 more phases to go and seeing how Phase One is never ending, I'm preparing myself to be homeless (that was a joke).
2. The topic of talks amongst my friends and I have been about our future. It's intimidating but nevertheless fun. I'm torn between 2 choices (business and law) and HEH, funny enough, the one I really want is out of the picture so basically I'm choosing between 2 picks I don't even want. That sucks. 
3. I currently want a lot of things and it doesn't require money. Hm ?
4. Not a fan of Lambert though he did pretty well in Motown week. GIRAUD ALL THE WAY
5. I miss 2008 for the friends. I miss 2007 for the carefree life. I miss 2006 for being new. I miss 2005 for the excitement. I love 2009 for the feel of being the age I've always wanted to be. Sweet 16, it truly is. But I still long for the years that blew by. 

Loves,

N

Rockn'

Grease 2

What better way to waste time than to watch old(-ish) movies?

For today, Clueless and Grease 2 were my pick. 

I swear to God, Michelle Pfeiffer is ridiculously gorgeous and during that time, she was pre-wrinkles so she looked even more flawless. Clothes, oh the clothes. She wore them more effortlessly than anyone else (Bloomwood went overboard with some, sorry to say.).

Ta

Glitter Fools You

I just had a long phone call with Sarah. Dah lama tak buat tu wei ! Rindu sial.

HAHA, bestfriendssssss foreverszzz

Sorry for the not updating, internet went haywire and I have nothing to blog about. My day's have been dull. 

It's earth hour now. Ultra cool. 

Neighbours are being a great sport and they're doing their part too ( I admit to have doubts, yes )

So..

49 minutes to go.

Have a great Earth Hour everybody.

A Walk In The Park

Many birthdays in April, I just realised. 2 of my bestfriends will turn in the early days of April and I'm excited for that. [ I JUST REALISED THAT! Amongst us six kan, 2 in January (Sarah 14th and I, 19th), 2 in April (Dina, 3rd and Ila, 6th) and 2 in June (Suraya, 22nd and Najihah 30th). Semua nak dekat je haha. Woohoo ]

I miss buying things. The queen of the house turned 41 on March 25th. She refers herself being 'upgraded' than a year older. I agree. She doesn't look 41 which after me saying that, gave a broad smile and replied a 'humble', 'I KNOW RIGHT!?'

Right.

Had a modest dinner at OU because it was a school night and present is still M.I.A. Pardonnez moi, I'm undercashed. 

My understanding of additional mathematics is still not taken care of. I really should ditch Mod Maths more often and attend Puan Sharifah's class. She teaches at my speed - snail slow. 

In tuition, I'm at logorithm or however it's called and it's fun once you get the hang of it. Adelynn and I could answer the questions despite being absent in last week's class. (Sorry bangga sangat dapat jawab soalan add maths HAHAHA).

I got a lot in my mind and it's bitching about a choice. An uncalled one at that. Not that it matters but hell. Should I or shouldn't I? 

Homework is piling and I'm doing nothing.

Good job. More of this and failure's on your way!

Okay, will/shall/WILL turn optimistic over the weekend. Maybe even more productive.

No promises.

RIGHT

Ok, it's like this.

I find it freakin' gross when a good friend of yours forgets you and chases after their new popular so-called 'bestfriends'. Macam hina sangat ke ah wei kalau tak gi lepak rasta semua tu? Hina sangat ke ah kalau tak dapat add maths 100 (no offence Dina, yous knows Is loves yous kans).

What? I'm not good enough for you? 

Please la, you look pathetic trying to morph yourself into the sticky mold of popularity. Just because (insertname) is popular and on the rise with the opposite gender, you want to hop on her/his bandwagon? Sumpah tu paling lame la kan. Tumpang orang nye fame. I say, get your own spotlight la kan.

Cuba rewind a few (tak boleh cakap time sebab nanti cam obvious gils) ago, you were with US! Sombong sial sekarang.

Sure, make time with your new friends. Kawan lama hampeh lupa ah.

Kawan apa benda ni ?

xoxo

MENGANTUK SIAL

See Me

Macam tak tahan je tengok.

I know smoking is bad and all but he's too freakin' irresistible.

School began. Ho Hum.

Plain Who ?

I have a skirt similar to hers.

So, sekarang kena cari baju and cardigan macam dia punya HAHA

I'm learning French via French For Dummies Audio Set !

Woot.