Currentals

I think I should start doing this Current favourite things every month so that over the months and years, I can see how much I've changed or not.

(also 'cause I got nothing else to blog about!)

Music

Justin Timberlake's 'Cabaret' from his second 20/20 album. SO good! I loved the first album like crazy and had it on repeat for weeks but I didn't really get the same vibe from his second album. Til I discovered this song! SO good! 

And I was in Izmal's room the other day and he had this song played on his Spotify and I thought it was so gangster that I had to have it on my own Spotify. It's 'Gangsta' by Kat Dahlia (lol) and it's damn good! And of course, I'm still on my Ariana Grande kick (Break Your Heart Right Back and My Everything are my favourites!) so sue me.

TV 

Ahhhhhh all my favourite TV shows are BACK! So that basically means two je; Grey's Anatomy and Scandal. Obsessed! And if that was not already enough for TV goddess, Shonda Rhimes, she just HAD to come up with a new one - How To Get Away With Murder. It's only been 2 episodes in but my God, it is AMAZING! Sooooooo good, really really! Go watch! 

And how can I forget? Guys, please believe me when I say I'm not a K-Pop fan but the other day, I texted my good friend Olan and he told me he's been watching Running Man and I just so happened to be on my laptop with nothing to do so I Googled it and got on the first link that came up (that's kshowonline.com, guys!) and I. Have. Not. Stopped. For. A. Second. It's the MOST hilarious game/variety show ever. I can have it on for 2 minutes and already laughing like a mad person. On occasions, I even have to give myself a break from laughing so much! It is soooooo entertaining! WATCH!!!!!!! You can watch pretty much any random episodes because it goes by themes so all episodes are different. You'll get used to their game style and the main leads of the show (#teamKwangSoo) by the 5th episode. And trust me, after watching one, you WILL be watching more.

Movies

What's new? I haven't been catching up with any movies lately. I think the last movie I went to the cinemas for was The Fault In Our Stars (in which I cried ridiculous amount of gross tears and snot) and that was pretty much it. I really wanna watch The Maze Runner and The Judge though! So off-putting lah the cinemas here what with it being so expensive. It's okay, more reasons to stay home and watch Running Man (no, guys, seriously, go watch, I am not kidding)

Fashion x Shopping

It had been a pretty frustrating weekend so I decided to channel that same frustration into my shopping. I bought a pair of shoes which seems and looks very inconvenient now with the UK showing its true colours (temperature dropped like don't know how to chill like that and it rains allll the time!) but there were so pretty and cool that I had to get it. I also took advantage of the 20% student discount hehe peace peace kacang peas. I bought a new jacket also because I was in need of something light and water proof. Also, it was pretty. 

This is not me btw, I wish it was. She looks so effortless cool and so put together even with the ripped boyfriend jeans and button all undone. So sexy but still so cool and chilled. Dream.

P/S : I'VE JUST DISCOVERED THE AMAZINGNESS THAT IS HIGH WAISTED JEANS. Covers your protruding belly from lunch and dinner and is so flattering throughout the day. I bought my first pair the other day because figured I could use some change in my life hahahahahaha sad

Tumblr Favourites

So this is basically the part where I show you some of my favourite current quotes and photos on Tumblr.

There's still a 6 year old Barbie obsessed girl rooted deep in me and so I thought this was the cutest thing alive! The Tumblr caption that came with it was "The revolution of selfie" hehe how cute Barbie love you xx

I saw a quote on Tumblr, 

"Treat her like you're still trying to win her, and that's how you'll never lose her"

And I agree so so much on this! I think sometimes boys can think they should just put in all the effort when he's trying to date the girl and lose it gradually when they've become a couple. You shouldn't. What's a bouquet of flowers here and then and what's going on surprise romantic dates on a Wednesday evening? It's always fun to keep things new and fresh and not act like an old couple. 

But, I also feel like it should be the effort of both the guy and the girl; guys shouldn't be the only ones trying, the girls should also equally be a part of it and should also treat the boy like how you guys were even before courting. It's the 21st century girls, show your man some love every once in a while and shower him with hugs and kisses and gifts and surprises every now and then. He'll be reminded of why he fell for you in the first place.

Ok so that's my current favourites as of October 7th 2014. I'll **try** to be good with this and keep it a monthly thing. Let's hope I don't forget! 

Hope you have a lovely week ahead of you! And if it hasn't been a good one so far, go get yourself something really good to eat and stay in bed and watch Running Man. I swear, laughing is the best medicine. It was and still is, for me. 

xx

Back!

Hi everyone!!

It's been a week since I've been in the UK already, syukur amin. I was in London for a few nights before making the bus trip back to Bristol. Heavy hearted to leave KL but a tiny bit of me missed the UK life so a tiny bit of me wanted to get on that plane and endure the horrendous 13 hour journey. Seriously, I hate flights!! I have the worst air sickness ever and throughout the whole 13 hours, I did not stand up a single time which is bad if you think about it but I really couldn't because I was feeling too nauseous. Imagine feeling like you want to throw up for 13 hours straight!!! Quite horrible gila babs one. But I managed to pull through (phew) and safely arrived London.

I just got back to Bristol yesterday evening and as much as I love London and all it offers, I missed Bristol quite a lot. It's very me. It's chilled but it gets pretty hectic when it wants to. But for the most part, it's chilled. And London can be very very exhausting. I now understand why my seniors told me they hate the tubes. It's so tiring going up and down and being in a stuffy carriage. I try my best to not get on the tube now.

ANYWAY

My independent living has started today. I went out to get new bed sheets because I got a bigger bed and I had groceries delivered and I cooked ayam kunyit for dinner and did my laundry. Quite proud considering I did not once attempted cooking any thing nor wash anything for the past 3 months. Teruk but hehehe was spoilt silly when I was home. The thing excited me most was getting my new duvet cover!!!!!! It's so beautifuuuuul I couldn't stop staring at it when I had it on. It's a floral motif one in all of my favourite colours.

I feel like such a grown up here because now, getting garlic and mushrooms and buying new bath mats is so exciting! Hahahaha, I LOVE grocery shopping here because there's so many things to choose from. Same with going to Boots to get my toiletries. My God, the array of hair products and skincare is insane!

Living independently can be quite tiring because you find that you have to do everything on your own and no one is going to help you but yourself. I mean, of course you have your friends but ultimately, it comes down to you to do things. Going to the bank, remembering you have to throw out the trash, writing down a list of groceries to buy and reminding yourself that the last brand of laundry detergent was rubbish so that you don't get the same one next time around. It's really memenatkan and some days you just want to bum around and not cook. But you can't because you have to! You realise that going out to eat is way too expensive especially on a student budget like ours. I read one of my seniors' tweet,

"Kalau kat rumah, hidup untuk makan. Kalau kat UK, makan sekadar nak hidup."

Which is soooooo true!! I LOVE to eat, I'd eat all day if I could in KL. And if there wasn't anything at home, I'd drive and grab something to eat. Money wasn't an issue and neither was transport. When you have the car, you can go mana mana also never mind. But here, ish. Makan whatever there is and LIVE WITH IT. Nowadays, I really cling onto my rice cooker like it's my prized possession (who we kidding, it IS my prized possession) because I can't be bothered to pay so much money on mediocre food. How much can one eat burger and fish and chips and sandwiches and kebabs. RICE FOR THE WIN. I just stir fry anything I find in my fridge and call it a day. And telur goreng. Nothing a fried egg can't fix!

So yeah, back to my independent living ways. I'm looking forward to seeing what this new academic year brings me! Also, all the traveling!! I hope to discover more places with my friends and eeeeep can't wait for our next holiday (mama papa don't worry lama lagi cuti so i'm studying now ok ok)

Hope you all have a brilliant academic year! xxxxxx


xx

Di sini lahirnya sebuah cinta

I have Katy Perry's summer anthem on and it's 1:16 am Tuesday morning. I'll be on the plane in approximately 9 hours, getting ready to take off for UK round #2.

I can't believe it's already been 3 months!

My heart is feeling so heavy to leave home again for 9 months. But if the past 3 months have been any indicator, the next 9 shouldn't be too far away. I've been loving home so much that having to leave on Malaysia Day itself is so sad. But at the same time, I am looking forward to start second year again because this time 'round, we have the whole lot of juniors joining us insyaAllah! Should be a fun and hectic time as it always is with them.

But ultimately, I'm so sad to leave this place :"((( I'm so Malaysian, it's ridiculous! No matter where I may go, I will always have Malaysia close to my heart. My favourite place ever lah, this place. From the food to the familiar rojak language, I grow to love this place more and more. I think being abroad for a long period of time made me appreciate Malaysia more bak kata pepatah orang putih "Absence makes the heart grow fonder".

This summer break, I

• Went to Penang and Terengganu with friends and went to the beach both times. 
• Had a splendid Raya Aidilfitri with my even more splendid family. 
• Ate Mak Tok's cooking for 2 weeks straight and then continued to devour food in all of my favourite places. Yes, that would include home.
• Watched Germany win the World Cup and stayed awake for most of the good matches. Sometimes alone and sometimes with a very sleepy Iman.
• Got treated to a Paris x Barcelona trip by Tania hehe she da real mvp for sure 
• Drove both Papa and Pak Tok's car!!!!! Yay!!
• Dressed up.
• Dressed down. 
• Went to Jumpstreet with 16 others and played dodgeball!
• Played card games and Cranium with my cousinzzz.
• Karaoke-d with my sisters!
• Celebrated Zaim's 20th.
• Tried new food in Terengganu! Pulut lepa is my new favourite tea time food. Only if they had it in KL!
• Went on breakfast dates, lunch dates, dinner dates, supper dates with different people. 
• Laughed my butt off.
• Cried my heart out.
• Tried my hand at street style photography with my bestie. 
• Went to KY twice! Ate at Garden Seafood twice also hihi 
• Chopped off my hair! 
• Had a pizza date with my Iman.
• Had a manicure date with my Tania.
• Had a heart to heart with my Zaim.
• Raya-ed with my friends and took endless selfies.
• Once again, played Speed with Pana..... I won.
• Learned how to play Taiti. Aced at playing Taiti.
• Went to a Vintage Fest with Marissa and then had a rather large curry puff and enjoyed live music. Best time!
• Got obsessed (and I mean, real obsessed) with Running Man. KWANG SOO FOREVER AND EVER
• Satisfied most, if not all, of my food cravings. 
• Spent time with all the people I care greatly for. 

May Allah bless my second year in the UK with all things good and may it all be smooth sailing for me. 

I looked forward to home for so long and it definitely lived up to all I had imagined and I'm forever and ever grateful to call this country home. I will definitely miss you and there will definitely be nights where there won't be nothing I won't do to come home even for a night but for the mean time, I have to face reality and be a good student. InsyaAllah!!! 

See you soon Malaysia, God willing! 

Pulau Pinang

Yesterday, Farhan, Kanda and I went on a spontaneous day trip to Penang. I've not been on a day trip to anywhere because even the thought of it is exhausting. But for me, it's always been "Anything for Penang". I've been going there all my life because my grandparents live there and we always try to go see them and we're always always there for Raya. It's really my favourite place next to my own home. I have always and always will consider it my second home. So, naturally I agreed to the day trip.

We left at 10 after having breakfast at McD. I had the back seat all to myself and I brought along my pillow so I had a good hour worth of sleep. The boys stopped by to buy fruits and for toilet breaks but #21 I really dislike stopping by anywhere when we're on the road. It's probably because I'm so accustomed to sleeping in the backseat that having to leave the car is so annoying. 

It was raining halfway and we arrived at about 2, I think? First stop was Line Clear nasi kandar for lunch. 

As you can see here, we finished everything. It was good and from my 21 years of life, I've not gone out for a nasi kandar experience. Because if you know my grandmother, you know that there's never a reason to leave home for food. And Pak Tok will always bungkus some for home so I really had no reason to go out to eat. Penang was raining then so it was nice and cool throughout the day; usually it'll be boiling! While we were eating, it hit me that this would be my last nasi kandar in a long while because we're all heading back to the UK soon. Hwaaaaaaaaa crying inside :"(

And then we headed back to my grandparents place because the boys wanted to pray and chill. It was raining so there wasn't really anything to do. Pak Tok and Mak Tok had bought so much food for just the three of us because she thought there were more people coming hahaha bless them. I initially didn't even want to tell them of our trip because I knew that this would happen. They'd fuss over food and all. But aren't all grandparents like that? Eep, so much love.

After about two hours, we left for some cendol loving at Chowrasta. My heart felt so heavy as we left the house because my grandparents are my favourite people next to my own parents. So leaving the house has always been difficult, even since young. And to know that I won't see them in a while broke my heart even more.

OK BEFORE I START GETTING REAL EMOTIONAL, LET'S MOVE ON TO having cendol.

We went back to Jalan Penang basically for cendol. I'm not really fond of it so I just took photos and breathed in familiar Penang air.

Psh! And they say we girls always silang our kaki when we take photos!

We then went to Batu Ferringhi. I haven't been there in ages! But when we were there, I fell in love again with the beach and the sound of the waves and the serenity of just looking out to the horizon. It reminded of how great Tuhan is, masyaAllah. And we were there during sunset which was even better. The cuff of my jeans got wet but I didn't mind, being at the beach was possibly one of my highlights of my summer break.

After walking around Batu Ferringhi and the boys got themselves some souvenir, we left for cheese naan at the very famous Kapitan in town. I'm not a humongous fan of cheese so I stuck to good ol' roti telur. I did steal a bite from Kanda though and it was really good but I'd probably be so muak of it halfway


We left Penang for home right after dinner. After eating all day long, sleeping wasn't a problem. But I had an eye out just in case Kanda got sleepy and needed someone to talk to.

So that was Penang for us! It was a greattttt day trip and I'm glad the boys enjoyed themselves there because I have such a special place in my heart for that place and to be able to go back there before leaving for the UK was amazing. Wished we could stay longer!

Time to hit reality now, sadly. Ahhhh, can't believe it's already time for university.

Skol-er-ship

(Please, I ask for your kind consideration to take this as my own opinion and you are welcome to disagree with me but just keep in mind, that this is my own point of view and I am very passionate about it as it is affecting my family and my friends. Also this is coming from a very frustrated 21 year old girl so please excuse me while I rant)

(from Merriam-Webster and Dictionary.com)

Now, I try to understand points of view from both parties most of the time so as to not misconstrue a situation. But if there's one topic that gets my blood boiling and need no justifying from any party, it's the issue of scholarships and loans.

During KYUEM, I was a privately funded student. And if you know the college, you know that the place is full with scholars. Deservedly so, they are all a bunch of bright students and even if you scored 10As during SPM, you will find yourself to be completely undermined because the girl sitting behind you in Math just got awarded the second best in SPM.... out of the whole Malaysia. This is a true story for me.

But, according to my understanding (backed by verified definitions above), scholarships and loans are meant to be given out to the smart and the less financially abled students. Not 'OR', but 'AND'.

"A foundation to provide financial assistance to students"
"An amount of money given by an organisation to help pay for the student's education"

There are a lot of rural schools and sekolah berasrama where some, if not most, students come from difficult backgrounds. As they succeed, they are awarded with prestigious scholarships.

Now, these people, I have absolutely no problems with. I'd be happy. I'd be championing their fight to get the scholarship or loan. 

But, me oh my, the people who have more cars than family members, fly across the world annually ("Hmm business class or first class this time?"), designer shoes, fancy dinner parties, houses too big for anyone, I humbly ask

"Why?"

Are you turning poor from buying that new Mercedes that you had to ask for a scholarship. Are you turning poor from all the vacation you've been having across the world that you've just had to apply for financial help.

These days, organisations are so blinded by who your father is or who your family is rather than what YOU're about and who YOU are. Yes, I know that you lot are a bunch of smart people, I won't hold you against that. But there are a lot more smart students who can't afford to pursue their education overseas. They simply don't have the money. 

Most of you lot reading this who might terasa pedas might very well be my closest friends and I try to not say this openly for fear that you might feel ashamed and embarrassed. Like I've said before, this is a sensitive topic and I try to be quite private about where I stand but I really can't hide my anger anymore.

My issue with this goes to both parties - the scholarship bodies and the financially abled students.

Let's first talk about the organisations responsible for giving out the scholarship and loans.

How is it possible for organisations to award scholarships and loans to the people who can very well afford it? This is such a simple and straight forward question yet it is still so pertinent. It's beyond my comprehension, to be honest. Let's be frank here and address the very apparent fact that high positioned members of society have a HUGE say in organisation's decision to grant someone a scholarship. Let's just put it out there.
In layman's terms, "cable". If you know someone, chances are the scholarship is yours. If your father or mother is someone, chances are scholarship is yours. I'm not generalising, of course. I'm just saying these are examples of what "cable" is. It's a matter of who's who. And it shouldn't be. Do a damn background check, for goodness sake.

"Oh what's this? A 5 figure monthly income? OK LET'S MOVE ON"

I know that organisations grant their prestigious scholarships to the intelligent, I won't discard their reputation. But my point is, there are other worthy candidates who are more deserving of your money. Have scholarship bodies forgotten that the main purpose of a scholarship is to provide financial help to students who aren't able to pay for themselves? A scholarship in all its entirety is MONEY. It is not a social status, it is not a trophy, it is not a title. My friend, Timothy, said that "what should be done is to remove this mindset that needing a scholarship to succeed is the only way". No, it isn't. I won't look at a privately funded student any different than a scholar.

Moving on to the students and the parents.

Can I just first clarify that I have massive respect for people who are successful because that climb to the top is no easy feat and I am an admirer of hard work and perseverance. Really. You are an inspiration, dear CEOs/managers/directors/founders/fancy titled sir or madam. One day, I do aspire to be you but for the meantime, my 21 year old self would like to humbly ask why and how and why and why and why.

I'm not a parent yet but I assume that as a parent, shouldn't your children's welfare be your number one priority? Ok, yes, they are.
So as a parent with a major income, shouldn't their education be the first thing you tick off your "To Pay" list? That's number one, right? Their welfare? Their education? Ok, yes. I can see you nodding from here and I can hear your "YES!" from here.

So why aren't you? Why are you letting someone else do it for you?

Look. If you can afford to give your children the luxuries in life (like a fancy vacation and a gorgeous home and a nice car and pocket money enough to get them that Prada shoes and the Dior bag), then can I just please ask why aren't you paying for the one necessity they need for the sake of their own future - their education? Shouldn't the first thing you think about when you are at that stage in life where you are living comfortably be "Ok, education is taken care of, alhamdulillah syukur, and all from my own hard work" and not "Ok, so which car you want?".

Priorities, sirs and madams, priorities.

"Help" and "Assistance" indicate that the student isn't able to support himself/herself and therefore needs some form of external financial aid to allow him/her to continue in his/her studies. "Help" and "Assistance" don't apply to the people who already have the means to support themselves. If you can, then why aren't you? Catch my drift?

And kids, I know you might tell me "Yes, but as their child, I want to do everything in my power to help lessen their burden" and I think that's incredibly noble of you to do. Yes, as daughters and sons, we want to try and do all that we can to help our parents financially.

But my dear friends, did you really need that new car? Did you really need to fly business class? Did you really need to be draped in designer wear ? If you hadn't bought that car or that flight ticket or that designer handbag, you'd be able to pay for tuition fees. The difference between you and I, my friend, is I don't have my own car to sell off in the first place and I don't get to travel as often as you and even if I did, I'm all the way back in economy and no, I don't have the fortune to be wearing designer because really, for anyone ever, a ridiculous amount of money spent on anything can only be justified if it was something like a first class education (or anything of the kind... y'know something that can be seen as a form of investment).

Don't get me wrong, guys, I'm not disregarding the fact that you are intelligent and well-rounded and you worked hard to get those As and you worked hard to ace that interview and you worked hard to prove why you're a scholar. I know. You are. I can shout it from the rooftops over how smart you lot are. I'm not saying that you don't deserve the scholarship based on your academics. I'm just saying, from a financial perspective (which is what a scholarship is essentially about), that money can be used to fund someone else's education.

So there. Take this post with a pinch of salt. This is my take on a topic I think some people are too afraid to talk about because it is such a touchy subject because personally we do know these people and we don't want to be in anyone's bad books. Believe me, neither do I but I feel like it should be said and it should be acknowledged because it just comes down to it being unfair to the students who are affected by this.

If you agree with me then great, it's good to know that I'm not alone in this. But if you don't agree, then I'd really really love to hear your point of view because even if things get heated, it is always nice to have a healthy debate and hopefully come to some form of understanding from both ends.

Cheers x



(also, for any grammar mistakes or typos, please forgive me for this was edited and posted at 5 am on a Saturday night)

Queen Z

(Guys.

So I just finished watching Beyonce's performance at the 2014 VMAs. She is possibly my favourite ever performer of all time. THE best out there nowadays. It's ridiculous how on point she is with every show she does!!! She really deserves all the success she's having now because I can't level her up with anyone else in the industry. I'm SO SO SO SO happy I went for her concert earlier this year! Ridicccccccccccccccccculous. Watching Beyoncé live should be on everyone's bucketlist. For real! 

Ok fangirling over Beyoncé over) 

So ok, proper blogging ensues!

I'd like to start off by wishing my bestie best girl, Zati, a happy 21st birthday !!!!!! Always the life of the party and the friend I always resort to about my problems. You've been so good to me during the years we've known each other and I appreciate you all the time, babes! Wishing you all the best things in life (so that's Chanel, Balenciaga and Tiffany's..... and success and love)! You deserve it muah muah babe girl!

For her 21st birthday, she called up her closest buds for an intimate birthday dinner at Acme Bar and Coffee at Troika. I've not been there so I relied heavily on my Waze. I like how people are still amazed that I drive here and there. Yes, guys, I drive. (I'm going off a tangent now to declare my love for Waze, that app has a special place in my heart)

I don't know what it is I do but I always manage to be late no matter how early I get ready! I think it's because if I get ready early, I'm so confident that I have so much time left to drive there without even accounting for the traffic or going to the petrol station. And in the end, I actually forgot to bring Zati's birthday present.

ANYWAY

It was so nice to see everyone. I hardly see the boys in nice shirts because they're always in their shorts and tshirt so it was a handsome sight. And the girls obviously dressed up, we go anywhere also we dress up lah so the birthday dinner was no different. We don't do dinners as often as we'd like (partly because none of us want to willingly volunteer to organise one, we're the laziest of bums!) so when there is one, I look forward to it like crazy because I get to put on pretty clothes and wear my heels! I try my best to avoid heels because they hurt my poor feet like hell after an hour. But I braved it out and also because I want to appear tall in photos.

I've been wanting to wear this top for so long now! I got so many nice compliments from my friends so it was a good thing I did wear it instead of letting it rot in my closet. It's from Seelovemine and I saw Yasmin Soh wear it on her Instagram and I HAD to get it. So I did. Like, 5 minutes later.

This beaut is 21 now !!!!! Still behaves like 12 but sokay sokay, she has the style of a 21 year old so that's okay. Hehehe.

We spent the night catching up with one another and taking photos and sharing laughs. I love my KY gang and I know we're known as being super clingy but living with one another for 2 years does that to you, like it or not hahahah. Looking forward to more and more birthday celebrations with each other. Sampai ke anak cucu, insyaAllah. How cute our kids will have play dates with one another hwaaa cries

I got her a birthday cake which spells out "Happy Birthday, Queen Z! Xoxo, Gossip Girl" because of her love for that show! Happy that she likes it! (if anyone wants novelty cakes like that, that also tastes AMAZING, can always ask me because I know a lady who makes them! She's been making them since I was small!)

Hope you're having/had a good day, everyone! And even if you didn't, there's always tomorrow. And the next day.

x

Questionnaire Take #4

I was reading through my old blog posts and I came across this questionnaire. I remember doing it all the time during the Myspace era! Figured I'd do one now too to pass time.

Where were you 3 hours ago?
I was in bed..... I think I was just off the phone with a friend who laughed in my face when I said I just got up. K, in my defense, I couldn't sleep last night!

Who are you in love with?

Have you ever eaten a crayon?

... No? 

Is there anything pink within 10 feet of you?

My pillow and basically all of my room.

When is the last time you went to the mall?

This is a good question. I was supposed to go today but my bed got too possessive. Geez.

Are you wearing socks right now?

Nope. I'm tired of them after wearing them all the time in the UK! 

Does your family have a car worth over $2,000?

Yes.

When was the last time you drove out of town?

I don't know if it really counts if I flew out of town to Penang for Raya. I'm about to, though, tomorrow! To Terengganu insyaAllah! 

Have you been to the movies in the last 5 days?

Nope! There's nothing good in cinemas lately.

Are you hot?

I mean, yeah. 

What was the last thing you had to drink?

Plain water. I think I should pat myself on the back for not drinking too much soda these days. 

What are you wearing right now?

My pyjama pants I got from Primark and a college tee that says 'Work Hard Play Hard' and has 'KYASU' on the back because we're too damn proud of being really really studious. 

Do you wash your car or let the car wash do it?

I've never washed the car................

Last food that you ate?

Nasi lemak. I'm really really hungry though now. 

Where were you last week at this time?

I think I went out with my friend. I just can't recall who with and where. 

Have you bought any clothing items in the last week?

NOPE! Achievement, I must say so myself. 

When is the last time you ran?

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha ok.

What's the last sporting event you watched?

Honestly? The World Cup finals. Amazing. I can't wait for the next one! DEUTSCHLAND! 

What is your favorite animal?

I don't have one, I'm just generally afraid of all animals - small or big. 

Your dream vacation?

OMG, so the last time I did this same questionnaire, my 2011 self said Monaco and this past year, I did go to Monaco!!!! My dream vacation would probably be somewhere serene and chilled. Like Bali or Bora Bora. 

Last person's house you were in?

My cousin's place to beraya. 

Worst injury you've ever had?

I think I scraped my knee. And that was all the way back in kindergarten. It was bad real bad Joe Jackson. 

Have you been in love?

I don't know. 

Do you miss anyone right now?

I do. Quite terribly. 

Last play you saw?

I'm so angry at myself for not watching any plays yet!!! I vow to go see Wicked in London soon enough. 

What is your secret weapon to lure in the opposite sex?

It's this thing called being understanding. If you don't understand why your boy is out late at night to have some drinks (sirap limau kinda drinks, hold your horses), then you're clearly not fun. Lolz x

What are your plans for tonight?

I'm going out for dinner with the parental units. And maybe drinks (sirap limau kinda drinks, guys, geez!) with some friends. If they're up for it. 

Who is the last person you sent a MySpace message or comment?

I can't even remember what I did last week, please don't expect so much out of me, guys.  

Next trip you are going to take?

To Terengganu tomorrow. I'll tell you how it goes soon insyaAllah!

Ever go to camp?

Nope, never in my life. And I don't think I will ever. Sorry, Bear Grylls. 

Were you an honor roll student in school?

Nope. But it's never too late! 

What do you want to know about the future?

Honestly. Who I would get married to so then I would know who's wasting my time. Cheh. 

Are you wearing any perfume or cologne?

I think I might have a bit of Zara left on me. 

Are you due sometime this year for a doctor's visit?

No. Hope nowhere soon! 

Where is your best friend?

Merata.

How is your best friend?

Syukur alhamdulillah, sihat sihat semua. 

Do you have a tan?

No considering I never leave the house lolz. Jokes. (not really)

What are you listening to right now?

Ariana Grande's 'Best Mistake'. Can't wait for her album to drop, she got dem pipes.

Do you collect anything?

I collect memories. Fuh. But no, I don't .

Who is the biggest gossiper you know?

Me. I am. And Diy. 

Last time you got stopped by a cop or pulled over?

Not once. I mean, I don't wanna say I'm a good driver but I mean...

Have you ever drank your soda from a straw?

Why wouldn't you! 

What does your last text message say?

"See you tau on Saturday"

Do you like hot sauce?

Forever and always.

Last time you took a shower?

At 4.

Do you need to do laundry?

Yeah. 

What is your heritage?

Malay, proudly so. 

Are you someone's best friend?

Hopefully! 

Are you rich?

I'm fortunate to have had the nicer things in life. Grateful everyday. Always always always feeling blessed.

What were you doing at 12AM last night?

Contemplating my life decisions. Lol jk I was watching SourceFed. 

A Night Of Trampolines

So last Monday, all 17 of us went to go see what the huge hype around Jumpstreet was.

Guys, the hype is real.

It's sooooooo much fun! I'm the most unathletic person you will come across in your life and even I found this to be so damn fun! I had the best time jumping around with my friends. We even managed to get a dodgeball court and we all had our own trampolines.

If you're thinking of going, I say to go with a big group of friends because that way you won't be too segan to start jumping ('cause I was) and you can play the dodgeball court and start a massive war hahahaha

I got there late because of the darn traffic so I didn't get to play as long as I'd like but even after just 15 minutes of jumping and running around, I was so out of it! My face went tomato red and I was soooo tired! So if anyone is planning to go for the first time, just go for an hour and see how you like it first.

But really really it's so worth it and I recommend it to everyone!!! You'll sweat about 4 buckets worth so wear something light and won't show your pit stains hahaha

It's open everyday according to the guy I asked and you can check the opening hours here! Really really really really fun and really really really really tiring! Perfect workout without sounding and feeling like one.


Happy jumping!

x

Us, girls

As a friend and a sister and as a girl in general, I've heard a lot of boy troubles. I've listened, I've advised, I've sighed, I've agreed and disagreed, I've taken sides, I've been on the fence.

But ultimately, I always find myself saying,

"Boys don't know what they do to us sometimes"

It keeps us up at night. It keeps us up thinking about you. We're annoyed at just how much we're consumed by you because most of the time, we're busy convincing ourselves that we're not.

The smallest joy you bring into our lives, they're magnified the second we like you. That small smiley you send us mean much much more than just a small smiley. That 5 minute call just to ask how we are mean much much more than just a 5 minute call when we fall for you. When you say you miss us, don't you know we miss you more. When you say good night and good morning, don't you know that it already is a good night and a good morning because of you. When we catch you looking at us from the other end of a table, smiling, we can't help but let out a sigh because that smile was for us, and only us.

Similarly, the smallest heartbreak you bring onto us, they're magnified. The change in the tone of your voice when you call us, and the change in your affection in your texts. Do you really think we don't know your change of heart. And do you really not know what that does to a girl. When you don't call us anymore and you don't text us anymore without explaining why. When you leave us hanging. When you finally tell us that "they cannot be anymore of you and me". It crumbles us and our hearts gets so heavy. The unhappiness and the heavy feeling of being on that end; I won't wish it on anyone. The heartbreak is real. I've seen it, I've experienced it.

When you have our heart in your hands, be careful. Because once we give away a part of our heart to you, we give it to you completely. It's yours. Even after things have ended, that place in us is yours completely. We don't revoke it just because we're not together anymore. The memories we've made together, we remember. The things you've done for us and the things you do to us, we remember. And it's not because we're obsessed with you, but it's because it was the only thing we can cling on to even when we've become nothing. Because it's the only thing you've given us.

When you put the kissing emoji after a text, it sends us over the moon. When you randomly tell us we're pretty, it sends us over the stars. When you say "Miss you already" with complete honesty in your voice, it sends us to a place beyond our control.

There's something about your name we're so enamored about. Let it be a notification on Twitter or Instagram or when you call us, when we see your name, we linger a little longer. It never bothered us before, but it does now. And we're thinking if you see our names the way we do yours.

You have to be flattered when a girl likes you. Because girls are egoistical beings. They push the idea of you for so long. So when they do allow a little space in their heart for you, treasure it. We don't do that often. I don't do it often.

Some boys might think girls are way way ahead of themselves for thinking about the future. It's not that. It's called being optimistic. We want to think that you're the one. We want to think that it'll work out. We start seeing your name and ours together and we like the way it sounds. I've seen some of my friends so happy and when they gush about their beaus, I can't help but immerse myself in their bubble of love because it's so damn contagious.

You don't know just how much you mean to us. Seeing you makes us weak at the knees and makes our hearts beat faster. Just recently, I was with a friend who met someone who meant a lot to her. They've not seen each other nor talked in a long time. She grabbed me by my arm and said "Nadia, Nadia, Nadia" and when I turned to see her, she had this expression as if she's just seen a ghost. She was shaking. She showed me her hands. They were trembling.

This is what you do to us.

When you make the first move, do you boys not know how much it makes our day. We smile stupidly at our phone screens, going back and forth the keyboard thinking of what to say to you next. We laugh at your jokes and they're not even that funny (ok fine sometimes they are). I can always tell when a girl is texting someone she likes just from how she acts when she's on the phone with him. She puts the phone down after a while but the smile is still sitting on her face.

We remember everything you've said to us. Sometimes, word by word. We take it part by part and analyse it and think WAY too much. We secretly hate it and we wish we could be boys for a second and chill about things too.

We look forward to you everyday. And one of the things that keep us up thinking is whether you look forward to us too.

Our friends know about you, they know about what you did and what you do and what you said and what we did. They just pretend to not know a thing when they meet you.

When things don't go well for us, we start beating ourselves up for it. Sure, we would put the blame on you and we would call you stupid and "ugh, boys" but at 2 am when the house is quiet, instead of taking apart what you say to us, we take apart what we said to you. We slowly feel this huge burden on our backs and question ourselves,

"Maybe it was because of me"

Were we not good enough for you, were we not accommodating enough, were we not worthy enough, were we not fun enough for you, were we not attractive enough.

Were we not enough?

And this part sucks. It really does.
Because we think of the things we could have done better or things we could have changed.

I know someone who couldn't bring herself to see anyone and do anything after her heartbreak. She was left paralysed for a bit because of what happened with her and this boy. And she's nothing like that in nature and I think that made me really see how much affect a boy can leave onto a girl.

Boys, you don't know what you do to us. You make us fall for you, you make us laugh, you make us feel really beautiful, you make us feel like we're the moon and the stars to you, but ultimately you make us really happy. And when I say happy, I mean genuine happiness engulfs us and we are in a state of bliss to be on that receiving end of your morning texts and your good night calls. Our little heart gets so full and we have a spring in our step and we look forward to you everyday.

I've been there myself and it was the loveliest feeling.

As girls, we analyse too much and it's harmful sometimes because we tend to make things up from nothing at all. We spend too much time and so much effort thinking what's wrong with us and why isn't he calling me or why was his last 'Bye' not accompanied with smileys or an 'xx' ? We get so worked up over nothing. Fights come about from us scolding the boys for doing things they never intended on doing. Girls, we have to admit this and we have to fault ourselves.

Boys say we think too much or we feel too much or we're way overbearing and overwhelming with our feelings. To be honest, I don't think there's anything wrong with that. It's our nature to think a little too much and feel a little too much. It comes with the territory of being a girl. And when we like someone, it goes beyond our control and we fall hard and we fall deep. Sometimes a little too hard and sometimes a little too deep.

And this, this we shouldn't fault ourselves for.

Salam Aidilfitri!

Salam Aidilfitri to everyone!!!

Raya is my favourite time of the year not only because I get to devour the best food but because I love to see families get together from their busy hectic lives and appreciate each other and ask for forgiveness. It's such a joyous time, I can FEEL your Raya spirit from your Instagram photos! It's so nice to see everyone in their new baju raya all sparkling and all fancy! I remember being so excited to wear my new baju kurung and then going to the kitchen to show it off to my grandmother!

I still do it.

I love Raya and every year I'm more and more thankful to be surrounded by my family and to have everyone here, alhamdulillah. And to be constantly served with such good food and an endless stream of kuih raya! Call me blessed.

I hope Raya means a lot to you as much as it does for me. It's a time for family and for friends to forgive each other and to have the time of their lives filling their tummies with the best kind of Malay food there is!! It's also a time to reflect and see how blessed and lucky we are considering there are other places in the world who aren't doing well this Aidilfitri.

Selamat Hari Raya and maaf zahir batin from me and my family to you and yours. I sincerely apologize for any of my wrongdoings, whether it was something I did or said or wrote on this very blog. I know sometimes 'Maaf zahir batin' feels like it's a chore to say to someone, sometimes I feel we've lost the meaning of it. But I'd like to really really say sorry to anyone and everyone for anything I might have done that might have hurt you in any way! I can sometimes be quite oblivious to what I do and say so here's my sincerest apology!

May you and your families be blessed this Raya!

Lots and lots of Raya hugs and kisses and salams from me!

xxxxx